My last Blog was written during my trip to Los Angeles in May, 2025. I did not include a couple of key items from that trip, so today (late Dec. 2025) I decided to add another story to complete this trip.
Firstly, I must cover why it’s been 7 months since my last story. A lot has happened this year, in a rather short time really. For those of you that know me, you know exactly what’s happened. My family suffered a great loss in 2025 and I just wasn’t drawn to writing. But as I sit here during the holiday season, I decided to put down my remaining 2025 experiences before the New Year arrives.
So back to May 2025 we go! My best high school friend, Diane, who lives in Oregon decided to visit Los Angeles while I was in town. I haven’t seen her in a number of years, so it was great to visit with her. She stayed with Lola and I in our hotel and was with us for three days. I didn’t tell anyone of her trip, so it was a great surprise when we visited Mother at the Rehabilitation Center and to my sister as well. We also visited my dad, who, after some prompting, remembered her!
My sister, Diane and I had a great meal at El Cholo Mexican Restaurant in Santa Monica (since 1923!). It was a good meal with Margaritas. On her last day in LA, Diane’s husband Greg drove down from Oregon to pick her up. That evening, we had a fabulous meal in Marina del Rey at The Warehouse Restaurant (since 1969), which like Tony P’s has a great view. It was a terrific end to a quick visit with an old, dear friend.
The rest of this 10 day trip included lunch with my sister, Norma Alicia at Tony P’s in Marina del Rey. This is Mother’s favorite restaurant and she loves the Clam Chowder. Norma and I had lunch at the restaurant and we took a Clam Chowder soup “to go” for Mother. She was very happy about that!
**NOTE: Once I returned home, I was sad to learn that this restaurant had closed.
My sister and I decided to visit Holy Cross Cemetery & Mortuary on this trip. This is where my brother is buried, who died in October 1979. We always knew that my parents had purchased a double plot right next to our brother, so they could be buried there. That is all we knew. We also knew that our parents had not made any other plans for their burials and it has always been a delicate subject around them. So we never discussed it. Since our father is not in any mental condition to discuss this, my sister and I decided to touch on the subject with Mother, if she felt up to it. I discussed it with Mother while she was in the Rehabilitation Center. She was willing to speak of only a few things that she wanted to happen at her funeral, whenever that happened.
How do you discuss this with an ill parent? Very delicately, I assure you. So we made some decisions with her, only stating that we didn’t know when this would happen, of course, but now was a good time to make sure we followed her wishes. Mother was ill in May, with her heart and related lung condition. But we were hopeful that she would finish her time at the Rehabilitation Center in Santa Monica soon and that would be able to move her to an Assisted Living Facility or nursing home.
Now back to Holy Cross Cemetery & Mortuary, it is a Catholic facility of course. We made a few appointments to discuss the purchased plots and what would need to be done once our parents passed. Honestly, we had no idea. It was good that we did this in May. There was no urgency and we had time, over a few appointments, to understand the process and relevant costs. The Planning Manager was great and walked us through everything. It was quite a challenge to find my parent’s “file” as it was off site at a storage facility. Afterall, it has been 45 years!!
There is a lot to consider, many decisions to be made and a payment plan to put in place. After they found the file, we were happy to learn that the plots had already been paid for in January 1980!!! Today, the cost of one plot is 20 times more expensive than what they paid for it in 1980. Wow!! We made the necessary arrangements and were given the opportunity to pay-over-time (6 years). If one or both parents passed before then the remaining balance for that parent would be due immediately. A funeral is an expensive occasion. So that was done.
As I mentioned in my previous May 2025 Blog story, I visited my parents daily. It was great to see them. My dad has been in the Nursing Home now for 2 years. Mother in the Rehabilitation Center was tough to see. She was very frail and weak. My sister and I met with her Doctor on a couple of occasions this month. He was a Doctor who specialized in Palliative Care. He is a wonderful person, very calm, caring and patient. Mother really liked him and we did, too. He helped guide my sister and I in Mother’s care, diagnosis and prognosis.
That about wraps up my May 2025 trip to Los Angeles. My dad was doing well, as usual. He has no illness other than his Dementia and his refusal to sit up, stand up or walk is merely a personal decision and not based on any medical condition. It’s unfortunate, but he spends his days 24/7 laying in bed. The nurses do force him out of bed once a week, and the only way to do that is with a mechanical harness that lifts him in and out of bed.
And here is lovely Lola on our hotel bed. Although I do bring her blanket (you can see it in pink on the left of the picture), she uses it sometimes yes and sometimes no.
